The church service just ended when she told me this short story. And it reinforced what I have always believed about marital love. Her husband wanted to make love to her. “I didn’t intend to deny him. But it was just one of those days that having sex was the last thing on my mind! The timing was just off for me. So I unwittingly told him off”
When the husband saw that she was unyielding, he left the house and decided to take a stroll down the street to cool off. The husband was to tell her later that what she didn’t know was that he was so very, very ‘on’.
As he was strolling down the street, like the young man in Proverbs 7, “…there a woman met him, with the attire of a harlot, and a crafty heart. She was loud and rebellious…” who was willing to give him access to what his wife had denied him.
The offer was tempting. Moreover, who would know? Certainly not his wife! After all, what she didn’t know wouldn’t hurt her, abi?
Although he felt hurt by his wife’s actions whom he loved deeply, it wasn’t just the love for his wife that stopped him. What constrained him was the fear of ‘hurting’ God with his actions. He was afraid of breaking God’s heart!
Personally, I could relate to his experience. And it just doesn’t apply to men, it does to women also. No man should ever think that his wife doesn’t face sexual temptations too. So you think you are the only hunk in town? Perish that thought!
I have always maintained that love for one’s spouse, no matter how deep, may not be enough as a defence when the ‘evil moment’ of sexual temptation comes. And take it from me, it will surely come.
Some of the men that mess around do so with their wedding bands right on their fingers! They are inadvertently telling their sinful women partners that they are married and are not leaving their wives for them!
Ask them if they love their wives. They’ll tell you yes. So why are they being unfaithful to her? They couldn’t resist the ‘opportunities’ being presented to them!
Now I have come to the conclusion that marital infidelity can only be curbed by the fear of God in a man’s or woman’s heart, not just love for one’s spouse.
‘Opportunities’ will present themselves. And it will be in discreet places and with people that have nothing to gain by telling your spouse. So if any man or woman doesn’t take advantage of the ‘opportunities’, it certainly won’t be because of the fear of discovery by the spouse. It must be the fear for someone greater.
Singles, I’ll counsel that you don’t make a decision to marry anyone just because he or she appeals to you, has a good job, or simply because you have a connection or that he or she can speak Queen’s English!
Are those qualities bad in themselves? Absolutely not! But do you want to enjoy marital fidelity?
Then settle for a man or woman who is wary of doing anything to disappoint or hurt God and not necessarily you. Only in that truth, can you enjoy marital sexual fidelity!